Tuesday, January 12, 2016

2016: My year to Pursue

My word for 2015 was Purpose. I had decided on NYE to keep that same word for this new year and continue in my quest for Purpose: to do everything with a purpose, for a purpose, and on purpose. But as I've been seeking rest and solace the past couple of weeks, I've decided to change the word that will define me this year.

My word for 2016 is Pursue. My heart's desire for this year is to be a pursuer of Godliness, happiness, fullness, family, rest, and purpose. In my tiredness and emptiness, I haven't been able to fully live, enjoy, or appreciate life. I've been consumed with certain responsibilities that have stolen my creativity. I'm doing so many things that I'm not passionate about, that it has taken me away from doing the things I AM passionate about. It's a tricky balance, one that I'm not managing very well. The balance I seek won't come overnight, but it will come.  Psalm 34:14 says to "Turn from evil and do good; seek peace and pursue it."

If I want to truly heal this year, I must be a pursuer of all things good, true and holy. I must spend more time doing the things I'm passionate about, and less time doing those things which expend all of my emotional energy. I love teaching. I'm passionate about teaching, but sometimes the extra responsibilities that come with working in a school drain us from getting to actually be good teachers. If you've worked in a small school, you might know what I'm talking about--there are so many extra things we must involve ourselves in, we end up spending our time on those things and very little on what we actually love doing...teaching. I haven't quite figured out how to balance responsibility with passion, which is one reason I'm slowly burning out. Which is why I end up working 18-19 hour days and trying to survive on 5-6 hours of sleep per night.

This year I'm determined to pursue rest, balance, passion, happiness, and holiness. I hope that by pursuing these things, I can be a better me. A better teacher. A better wife. A better parent. A better friend.

Jeremiah 29:13 You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart.

In the car again, on our way to the beach.

Outskirts of Lima, a city I love.

Christmas Day football in the park, our family tradition!


Lynda O'Donnell said...

Stacey, I love your honesty in this blog. I, too, have been through burnout. However, I was a single woman at the time, so I could just pull away into my own space to cope. I also understand the stresses of teaching (which are difficult to verbalize or itemize individually - it is the constant barrage of work and expectation that overloads us). I admire you for putting your struggles and hopes out here for us to empathize with. My word for 2016 is Transparency. No more holding up this mask to prove to all of womankind that I can cope as well as them. It's time to be vulnerable. True healing can only come when we allow others to see us, know us, and love us - and this allows others to take their mask down too. Thank you for letting us see behind yours. Much love and the grace of God to you xx

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